What the hell is up with so many girls on tracker putting themselves down and talking shit about their own bodies?? Do they even REALIZE the fucked up and NEGATIVE thoughts they are puttin not only in their OWN minds...but maybe of other women who look up to them?? I dont get it.
When you are IN SHAPE and FIT--alot of women (especially those who are either new to the site or are tryin to get fit) will look up to you. Thats a given...it comes with the territory. Then..when you post pic after pic after pic lookin strong, lean & fit but say "Wahhhh Im soooo fat! Wahhhh my ass is fat and ugly....Wahhhh my belly is soo fat" "Wahhhhh I look like a COW!" etc, do you even stop and think about how someone who is-ohhh I dunno--severely overweight or someone who LOOKS UP TO YOU may take those comments? Even MORE IMPORTANT--Do you ever stop to think how YOUR OWN MIND & BODY takes those comments?!
I know I've had the thought :"Well damn-if "so & so" thinks She's fat & ugly...what in the fuck does she think when she looks at my 210+lb body." (Luckily Im now to the point that I dont really care/give a fuck what they would say or think--but its taken a long time to get to that point)
I know Im always talkin about "Dont care what other people think", but some of these women ARE "Role models" for others on the site....and self-bashing is NOT an attractive quality in anybody--no matter how lean, cut, hot or beautiful the outside may be.
I bring it up not only becuz it makes me fuckin sick...but becuz I know Im not the only one that feels this way. Ive had a few girls on tracker PM me about this, and they are already so PARANOID to post their before pics and then they read comments from their "idols" and it affects them & intimidates them even more. Most of the PM's included something along the lines of "I just wish my "AFTER" pics could look as good as "so & So's" BEFORE pix!
Ok...just about every woman I know deals with SOME(ALOT) sort of body-image/self esteem issue about their bodies. Thats "normal". But what doesn't seem normal is to keep publicly "broadcasting" how unhappy or insecure you are about it but then posting numerous pics in bikinis, lingerie or whatever. Its just CONFUSING as all hell. Is it a cry for attention? A desperate way to get "validation"? Is it a temporary "rush" to have everyone ELSE tell you " Oh NOOOO Girl...you look HOT!" Hell..I wish I knew, but I don't.
What I do know is that ALL OF US women need to LOVE OURSELVES...BE OUR OWN BEST FRIENDS....PRACTICE POSITIVE SELF TALK and stop all the fuckin "bashing". EMBRACE YOUR BODY (and whatever "flaws" you might see in it...LOVE IT...TREAT IT and YOURSELF with respect, and act like the STRONG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN that you are!!!!
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
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14 comments:
wow!! what a great and honest post! I'm right there with ya on wondering why so many are "verbal" about how they don't like their bodies. I mean, there are tons of things I don't like about mine either. sure I could look leaner...work on my cellulite...tighten up areas that aren't so "tight" anymore, but I've come to accept my body. I will always try to reach new goals within myself...and get in "the best shape" before events in my life, but overall...I love me.
as for those girls who are whining about being fat, etc when they look amazing?? I think it's what you say. they are either fishing for a compliment or they seriously have some issues within themselves on acceptance. I don't like reading those negative type of comments...I can just imagine how a newbie on tracker would feel seeing a "perfect" body bitching like that.
we just all need to remember...you never know who looks up to you. so love yourself! be yourself!! and only compete with YOURSELF! :) comparing ourselves to others only brings us down.
love you!! xoxo
Hey...I started to count how many times you said FUCK...but lost count reading your post. I haven't really looked around Tracker much...but I totally understand what you are saying.
You are so right-we need to love ourselves....ROCK ON HOT GIRL!! Your post made me laugh....just remember....YOU ARE FUCKING HOT!! Love ya girlie...Dee
Thanks Jen- I loved what you said & HOW you said it.
Kana-you kill Me!!
And just for the record--FUCK is my word of the month....(I stole it from Stef!)
And I THINK the "fuck-count" was 5...Im fuckin slippin! fuck-I hate when that happens
Dana, I totally agree with you and I am not on tracker alot anymore since my bashing. The site has changed so much and it is not as positive and women sometimes do that to "fish" for compliments but they should feel good about themselves. Craig said the other day, that he loved every curve on my body! So you know what, it can only get better with a challenge! Self improvements from within can strengthen a relationship. Great post Dana and I love to see this one coming from you. Love you girl!, Udenia
Great post, Dana!
I keep going back to when you do a comp...your body never looks good to you, during or after.
You made so many great points. Loved the honesty :o)
Hey Dana, awesome to catch up on your blogs mate!
LOVE the way you write!
Umm, as for photos and comments I do so get you.
On my blog however I post pics of myself in various clothes/various stages NOT for validation or anything, more as a personal diary and I do look back over my posts regularly. Positive comments are awesome but I don't live to expect them.
I haven't looked on tracker but I suspect some people who put pics up aren't UNHAPPY totally with their bodies, they are actually quite smug with their progress before posting the pics. But they they have fitness targets etc to meet and know they could train a bit harder/eat a bit cleaner etc and just as a diary like to restate their goals.
I agree they shouldn't say really negative things though and should watch how they word things they could improve on if they put their pics on a public site.
Keep up the great work!
PiMp
PiMp is in 'da house!! Girl..WHERE in the world have you been?! Im guna hafta check out your blog in a minute too :)
I totally understand about "progress pics"--they are VITAL!! My problem is with the Negative self talk. Hell BE PROUD of how amazing your body is looking and LOVE it--even if it is not EXACTLY where you want it to be ya know?
BTW...I think Blogs (or even tracker) are great places to post progress pics...and I totally believe that everyone -no matter HOW fit/in shape they are should ALWAYS reach for higher goals, etc. (Thats what leads to STAYING in shape.) I just wish the girls would leave out all the "shit" they say about themselves. Theres NOTHING positive about it.
Cant wait to check out your Blog...Miss ya PiMp!
AMEN!
THis was a HUGE topic of mine and Maria's conversation last weekend. I am guilty of complaining and I KNOW if I want to be a role model than I MUST be positive, happy and enjoy that I am healthy.
What a GREAT...honest post.
THANK YOU!
I do agree with you and think I am probably guilty of this, but I swear I don't do it to fish for compliments...I look at plenty of other girls on tracker who look fabulous and I know I'm not fat or big but I guess we are all our own worst critics. It's good of you to be so up front and honest about it. That's one thing I love about you!
Yeah...what you said! And you nailed it girl! Amazing how us ladies don't give ourselves enough credit!
And thank you for my very much needed daily dose of potty mouth. I LOVE how real you are on your blog! Ha!
Keep Smiling Chicka!
Great post Dana! I don't post pix often because I don't want people to see the backsliding that happens. Its embarrassing.
I am really, really, really working on the positive self talk. I have my "sayings" that I run thru my head on a daily basis. I think it is helping a lot with my self image. I know that I am fit and strong and in pretty good shape...not that I could step on stage anytime soon, but in good shape in the sense of normal, day-to-day life. Sometimes I wonder if this lifestyle brought on my body image issues, instead of making them go away.....hmmmmmmm!
=)
ps...yes **FUCK** is my favorite word....it can be yours too!
It's possible that some people are identifying things they'd like to improve about themselves in the coming weeks. I do some of that. I know where I'd like to be, and I assess myself against that. Yes, I can appreciate how far I've come, but I'm not done yet. Posting it and making it public may help some people hold themselves that much more accountable. Anyway, I'm a male, so maybe it doesn't fully apply....but thought I'd chime in anyway.
Oh...and you ladies FUCKING rock!
Yeah...we men can say it too!
I loved your post Dana. I think all WOMEN should celebrate who they are and we, as women, should support one another.... :)
Love you!
~ Elizabeth
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