And that's puttin' it NICELY!!
I just dont get it-"THOSE PEOPLE" who feel like they ALWAYS need to say sh*t....even if it's something they know nothing about. Prime example:
Today Im MINDIN MAH OWN BUSINESS at the gym....doin my BFL UBWO, and this (really annoying b*tch) Girl just HASTA talk to me. (I guess she doesnt realize that I 'm wearin my headphones for a REASON--so dummies like her dont talk to me)
Her: Ohhhhh...your BAAAACK to doin Body For Life I see. I thought you had a TRAINERRRRR? (She kinda made this irky lil voice when she said trainerrrrrr)
Me: I did, But things changed & Im back to doin BFL now.
(Small talk went on: Blah blah blahhhhhh....)
She kept askin WHY this & WHY that (nosey lil b*tch) ...and finally I just told her:
The diet plan wasnt working for me. I tried & tried & TRIED to follow it , but the whole low carb/NO carb thing & never eating healthy complex carbs kicked my ass. I ended up gettin pretty messed up from it...
Her: Why didnt you just "Stick it out" & TELL YOUR TRAINERRRRRR?! Ya know, trainers change things like that IF YOU TELL THEM, but c'mon...theyre not mind-readers!
Thats when I LOST IT!! I ended up "pretty much" goin off on her--until I almost made her cry. (I felt KINDA bad-but damn!) Who is this b*tch to tell me that all I had to do was TELL MY TRAINER and STick it out?!?! Shit I DID tell my trainer. I confessed time & time again that I was having SERIOUS issues with my diet. I BEGGED my trainer for 4+ MONTHS to just add a YAM or some fruit, or brown rice back in to my diet & I KNEW the bingeing would stop. I told my trainer about feeling crappy.... I told my Trainer about the headaches, bitchyness, lack of sleep, lack of energy, I told & I told & I told. But, It didnt happen-- I never got that "Approval". I just kept hearing "Bingeing is NOT about food-its about the mind."
I do agree that bingeing IS about the mind...but FOR ME (who has had bingeing issues in the past) when I cut my calories too low or cut out healthy carbs for very long, It leads to a crazy-uncontrollable-almost-unconcious-type of bingeing. (as oppossed to the "Thought-out" binges I did in the past) (I knew that-but I TRIED & TRIED to "stick it out", becuz I had so much faith and respect for my Trainer.)
I guess I just got so pissed off becuz I felt like she was talking down to me, putting me down-like I was stupid for deciding to not stay w/my Trainer. She doesnt know how hard I tried to stick it out. She wasnt there for me when I was crying all the time, & super-crazy-emotional. She didnt deal with the headaches, the moodiness, the anger & frustration or the feelings of inadaquacy that came over me becuz I couldnt "stick it out". She wasnt the one that HATED lookin in the mirror and was disgusted by what I saw. Hell...she wasnt even there when I was gettin numerous blood tests done at the Dr.s Office becuz I was feeling SOOO sick all the time! Unfortunately my 2 BFF's and Chris did see all of that...(And belive it or not-they STILL love me!)
So what the hell was my point of this post anyways?? Lets see:
#1--I needed to VENT!
#2--Sometimes things just dont work out. That doesnt mean that ONE person was at fault...it just means IT DIDNT WORK OUT. Period.
#3--I don't binge when I eat healthy BALANCED meals
#4--I love love love having yams, fruit, brown rice & other BFL approved foods back in my life
#5--Dont be so fast to judge someones decisions. You dont know what theyve been thru or how they got to the point their at.
#7--Just becuz something works for "A, B, & C" it doesnt mean itll work for "D" too! Theres lots of plans, programs & trainers becuz different things work for different people AT DIFFERENT TIMES!
#6--the old "bitch-dana" is on her way baaaack!! (Ive kinda missed her!)
Monday, February 4, 2008
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6 comments:
Never judge until you've walked in someone else's shoes. I felt like I've walked in yours those - all things I've thought/heard/said myself. BFL is wonderful ain't it.
great post. honest and true.
I've missed the old "bitch dana" too. and I'm so happy she's back. :) you know how to rock it girl...let's do this the RIGHT way.
came across your blog and have not read it before today. that is too bad about what happened to you. i felt compelled to write because i can relate to what you said. i think everyone needs to find their own way and you have found yours.
as a trainer myself, i struggle sometimes with getting clients to do the things "i" think they should, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. many find out that i was right, and some that they were right. your trainer probably knew you better than most people and she may have had the right approach and time will tell. just be open to the fact that one day you may find that your trainer was right in the long run. maybe that girl came your way for a reason today. even though i'm a trainer, i use an online trainer myself to keep me in check. sometimes he gives me what i want to eat and sometimes he does not. right now i'm eating pasta, bread and potatoes. in the beginning i could not because of my past AND because of my metabolic type (i was more than a binger--it was bad for me at one point). my trainer had to get my head right. he did. it took time for me because of my history. i will not bore anyone but i had a f#$ked up early childhood and should be dead. in the beginning my trainer kept me close and away from certain foods for the "mental" reasons. i fought it for months but found out he was right. i'm just sayin that sometimes there is purpose behind all things. your trainer may prove to be right one day so keep an open mind. i guess i'm also speaking from a nutritionist standpoint and when a client says "I NEED" rice or yams or something like that, that is just not the case. in fact, many can NOT lose the weight they want if they eat those things. i did BFL and it took my body ONLY so far. my trainer took it to the next level.
that girl should have minded her business, but maybe there is more to it is all i'm saying. i'm in agreement with the other bloggers to some degree but i'm also NOT. think for yourself and listen to your heart.
so so sorry for rambling but my heart was screaming and telling me i needed to do so. sorry if i went on too much. if you ever want to e-mail me i would love to talk. think we have a lot in common.
only good thoughts to you :)
Well! Glad you feel better! :)- I have always said, people will always have something to say about something you have because "they want it" but they do not understand "how you got there" whether it be the struggles or achievements and in their own struggles, believe the grass is always greener on YOUR SIDE! So stay strong, dig deep and always believe in yourself! You can do it! I know you can! Your body will adjust to the right way to eating and will reap the benefits!
Laurie: I hate that youve had to "walk in my shoes", but it really INSPIRES me to see that you made it thru & came out STRONG! Thanks Girl for letting me see that it gets better! {{Hugs}}
Jen: Can't wait to see what kind of results we get this time around! You know I love you Girl-and couldnt do this without you!!
Mia: Thanks for droppin in & sharing. That is fantastic that your Trainer helped you get past your past! I absolutely LOVE success stories!! :) And dont worry- I am keeping an open mind, I learned a whole lot from my Trainer & will be forever grateful.
Udenia: Thanks Sistah...you sure know how to put a smile on my face! Give that Lil' Cutie-pie of yours a big hug from me....and thanks so much for the reminder--The more I think about it-the grass IS pretty damn green on MY side! Im so blessed....thanks again for reminding me!
After reading your post I thought, "Amen." You're right - no one knows your own body better than you except you. You know what works for you and what doesn't and though your trainer may have created plans that worked great for others it just didn't work for you. It does NOT mean that you failed or didn't try and stick it out. It just means that it didn't work for you and there is NOTHING wrong with that. It sounds like you are doing a lot of really great, healthy things for yourself - physically and mentally. I'm proud of you. :)
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